I wish normal things happened to me

I was just remembering the time I got kicked out of "The Attic," my favorite dance club, after I got caught watching random dudes pissing at the urinal in the bathroom? They threw me into an alley and I landed in a puddle of barf and urine? When I woke up, some homeless men started yelling at me, next they doubled-up on me.  I really enjoyed their smelly cocks? I remember when one of the homeless men fired his diseased seed into my mouth and said, "Here's a little HIV juice for you Kurt!" I contracted AIDS and cut my life expectancy by 35 years? This really turns me on because I am a deranged bug chaser? I sure had a fucked-up experience that time!